May 27

Rock of the Marne

Rock of the Marne

You know what really sticks in my craw? When political correctness demands that actual history be rewritten to accommodate those prone to outrage.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t another boorish rant on political correctness. It’s just a rant at shitty rewrites.

The Dogface Soldier was a song written for the Third Infantry Division, of which I was a part for about a year before transferring to a better job involving a red beret and sitting on my ass in front of a computer. In PLDC (the course required for promotion to Sergeant) we had to memorize this song, and actually sing it. read more

Jun 24

I’m going to take a stab at putting something on here every day. Honestly, I probably won’t follow through on this because I’ll find myself straining to have an opinion on extremely trivial and mundane bullshit.

Kind of like

After oh, let’s say 5 years of being pestered by these bastards I finally decided to sign up for the minimal subscription to view the people who’d signed my profile or some such. Whee. I could have spent that $15 on all kinds of things that would have provided more gratification; like a dozen boxes of thumbtacks to roll around naked on. Yeah, I ended a sentence with a preposition, what. read more

May 27

Back when I was a young Buck Sergeant in the U.S. Army, I ran into trouble trying to re-enlist. It wasn’t because the Army didn’t want to keep me around, even under Clinton they were smart enough to try and keep an NCO who’d maxed his promotion board.

No, it was the Company Commander who was holding up my re-enlistment because he knew I was going to take the option to bail on his ate-up unit as a part of my package. My enlistment was up in 2 months, and he wanted me to somehow take care of it after I joined them on a 3 month excursion to the Middle East. Apparently other people had jumped ship and his ass was in a sling trying to find competent NCOs who’d prop up his house of cards on their backs. read more

Mar 11

Boredom and the desert make for great pranks.

We were at NTC (The U.S. Army National Training Center out in the California desert) doing the tear-down of equipment and stuff to ship back to our unit so we could get the hell out of there. As an E-4 due to be promoted in the next few months to Sergeant, I got stuck running this detail.

For those of you who’ve never had one, the MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) we were stuck subsisting on, came with a nifty little chemical “heater” in the hopes that adding heat to the main entres would help offset the fact that most of them tasted like mashed feet. read more

Dec 21

Ok, so I’m not so much of a nerd that I’m going to piss and moan about George Lucas raping my childhood with Greedo shooting first and the rest of the crap he did when he screwed around with the original versions of the Star Wars films.

But I always did like the Ewok song at the end of Return of the Jedi. As a kid I thought it was catchy and it was kind of nifty how the end blended whatever the hell the Ewoks were singing, with English, although I was never quite sure what they were saying. I was mildly miffed that they replaced it with corny instrumentals for the “remastered” version. (Ok, the dumb-looking circular explosion effect when the Death Star went down was irritating too.) read more