This is from a speech Robert Heinlein gave in 1973 to the United States Naval Academy.  I’ve picked it up where he gets to the heart of the subject he wanted to impress upon the midshipmen; the fundamentals of morality and why patriotism is a practical matter of survival.

…why would anyone want to become a naval officer?

In the present dismal state of our culture there is little prestige attached to serving your country; recent public opinion polls place military service far down the list.

It can’t be the pay. No one gets rich on the pay. Even a 4-star admiral is paid much less than top executives in other lines. As for lower ranks the typical naval officer finds himself throughout his career just catching up from the unexpected expenses connected with the last change of duty when another change of duty causes a new financial crisis. Then, when he is about fifty, he is passed over and retires. . .but he can’t really retire because he has two kids in college and one still to go. So he has to find a job. . .and discovers that jobs for men his age are scarce and usually don’t pay well.

Working conditions? You’ll spend half your life away from your family. Your working hours? “Six days shalt thou work and do all thou art able; the seventh day the same, and pound the cable.” A forty-hour week is standard for civilians — but not for naval officers. You’ll work that forty-hour week but that’s just a starter. You’ll stand a night watch as well, and duty weekends. Then with every increase in grade your hours get longer — until at last you get a ship of your own and no longer stand watches. Instead you are on duty twenty-four hours a day. . .and you’ll sign your night order book with: “In case of doubt, do not hesitate to call me.”

I don’t know the average week’s work for a naval officer but it’s closer to sixty than to forty. I’m speaking of peacetime, of course. Under war conditions it is whatever hours are necessary — and sleep you grab when you can. Read the rest of this entry »

Rock of the Marne

You know what really sticks in my craw? When political correctness demands that actual history be rewritten to accommodate those prone to outrage.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t another boorish rant on political correctness. It’s just a rant at shitty rewrites.

The Dogface Soldier was a song written for the Third Infantry Division, of which I was a part for about a year before transferring to a better job involving a red beret and sitting on my ass in front of a computer. In PLDC (the course required for promotion to Sergeant) we had to memorize this song, and actually sing it.

But the lyrics always sounded… off. Here they are as we were instructed:

I Wouldn’t Give A Bean
To Be A Fancy Pants Marine
I’d Rather Be A
Dog Face Soldier Like I Am

I Wouldn’t Trade My Old OD’s
For All The Navy’s Dungarees
For I’m The Walking Pride
Of Uncle Sam

On Army Posters That I Read
It Says “Be All That You Can”
So They’re Tearing Me Down
To Build Me Over Again

I’m Just A Dog Face Soldier
With A Rifle On My Shoulder
And I Eat Raw Meat
For Breakfast E’V’RY Day

So Feed Me Ammunition
Keep Me In Third Division
Your Dog Face Soldier’s A-Okay

When sung, it sounds even cornier than it reads. And this bugged me, so I looked up the song and found that it had been changed, somewhat dramatically. Here’s the original version:

I Wouldn’t Give A Bean
To Be A Fancy Pants Marine,
I’d rather Be A Dogface Soldier Like I Am.

I Wouldn’t Trade My Old O.D.’s
For All The Navy’s Dungarees
For I’m The Walking Pride Of Uncle Sam;

On All The Posters That I Read
It Says The Army Builds Men
So They’re Tearing Me Down To Build Me Over Again

I’m Just A Dogface Soldier
With A Rifle On My Shoulder
And I Eat A Kraut For Breakfast Everyday.

So Feed Me Ammunition,
Keep Me In The Third Division
Your Dogfaced Soldier Boy’s Okay.

(Bolded emphasis, mine.)

Was that really so offensive that they had to change it? The song was written in World War II. It was the music with which the legendary Audie Murphy is associated. Would anyone really have gotten their panties in a bunch if they’d just kept it as it was; an homage to the battles that distinguished the 3rd ID as a fighting force?

Here’s the music to the song: